Childhood trauma led her toward self destruction and abortion, but a heartbeat turned the tide

When she was just five years old, Christa Elisha experienced sexual abuse at the hands of a family member. She didn’t clearly comprehend the horror of what was happening but knew something wasn’t right. Sadly, her early teen years would be marked by abortions, drug abuse and homelessness due to unresolved trauma from the abuse.

Elisha told Live Action News, “In my family, there were never discussions about sex; it was as if my parents wanted to preserve our innocence forever. I think this lack of open communication set me up as easy prey for predators because of my naivete.”

At 12 years of age, Elisha developed an infatuation with a 20-year-old man who took advantage of her childish crush, and she became pregnant. 

“I had no idea I was pregnant,” Elisha said. “I’d only had one menstrual cycle, but my mom knew; she gave me a pregnancy test to confirm it.”

A family member offered to take Elisha to another state to get an abortion, but she refused. 

Elisha said, “I knew inherently that it was wrong and decided to carry my baby to term. I thought if Mary, Jesus’ mother could give birth at 15, I could do it at 13.”

Tragically, Elisha’s baby, whom she named Gabriel, was stillborn. Because her pregnancy had been shrouded in secrecy, she wasn’t permitted to have a public funeral and had to bury her baby in an unmarked grave. 

“I had never experienced childbirth or death before and I was devastated,” Elisha said. “There was no healthy outlet for me and as a result, I wasn’t able to properly grieve.”

Aching inside, she ran away from home, was eventually remanded to a juvenile detention center, and was evaluated at a psychiatric hospital. 

Elisha said, “It was recommended that my aunt get custody and I go to a different school since I was in class with the brother of the man who fathered my child.”

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Fears surrounding pregnancy and childbirth spur further abortions

Unable to enforce boundaries, it wasn’t long before Elisha entered a sexual relationship with a married man and became pregnant. This time, she decided to end the pregnancy.

“I was terrified of the same outcome as before,” Elisha said. “There had been so much anguish surrounding my pregnancy and childbirth. At the time, I didn’t understand the consequences of abortion. A piece of me died that day as I lay on the table at Planned Parenthood.”

Broken and scarred, Elisha sought relief from illicit drugs to dull her pain. By the time she was 17 years old, she was homeless, heavily involved in the drug scene – and pregnant again. 

Elisha said, “My boyfriend demanded I have an abortion. I was worried the drugs I’d been using might have damaged the baby, so I agreed.”

At the abortion facility, a woman praying on the sidewalk took ahold of her hand, looked into her eyes, and told her she didn’t have to get the abortion, but her boyfriend interceded, asserting that Elisha would be getting the abortion.

Afterward, he dropped her off on the street and coldly told her the relationship was finished.

That night Elisha attended a party and overdosed. Her fellow party goers unceremoniously rolled her into a dark closet where she was left without further assistance. She awoke the next morning, alone. She vowed never to consume drugs again.

A heartbeat on the screen turned began to turn the tide

Later, Elisha was working as a waitress at the Waffle House, trying to rebuild her life, when one morning she went into anaphylactic shock and was rushed to the hospital.

Elisha said, “The doctor came into the room and jubilantly told me he had some good news – that I was pregnant. As such, I had to stay in the hospital for a few more days. Here I was, homeless at 18, pregnant for the fourth time, wondering what I was going to do.”

But the moment Elisha saw her daughter’s heart beating on the ultrasound, she fell deeply in love with this tiny preborn child.

“My daughter inspired me to reconcile with my parents. I attained my GED, and got financial assistance while I attended beauty school,” Elisha said. 

She later had another child, a son, but turned to drugs once more when she became entangled in abusive liaisons. At her breaking point, Elisha called out in desperation to God.

Elisha said, “Everyone I was hanging out with went to prison, yet I was spared. It was a wakeup call, forcing me to get clean for good. But I needed God to intervene and rescue me. It was time to surrender my life to Christ, for He had died so I could live.”

Being a renewed believer forced Elisha to face her abortions, to own up to her complicity in the demise of two babies. 

“The Holy Spirit told me I was now a new creation; that I had been forgiven and now I needed to forgive myself.”

Her journey in the 12-step program gave her the chance to seek forgiveness for the children she had aborted. As she took inventory of those she hurt, she wrote a love letter to her two aborted daughters. 

Elisha said, “God had shown me in a dream that my babies had been girls. In my letter to them, I apologized for taking away their rights to live, to have their personhood acknowledged. I promised them I would always share my story; always celebrate new life, be a good mother and never again have another abortion.”

Elisha said God showed her another vision in which she met two other children: a boy and a girl, whom she understood were siblings. As she shared this revelation with her mother, she was stunned to discover her mother’s history of two abortions.

“It was as if God brought my life full circle,” Elisha said. “I felt God’s heart breaking for mothers who, like me, never had a chance to grieve or give voice to their anguished pasts. I wanted to give these mothers a voice and set them free from unforgiveness.”

A purpose-driven Elisha founded the Speak Life project, “a video series and social media movement created to give voice to the silenced victims of abortion” highlighting compelling videos of Christian parents impacted by abortion.

Elisha said, “My hope is that my life will serve as a memorial stone for the two daughters I never had the chance to know. God has used me to help other women to break the chains of depression and anxiety amid powerful life transformations. I’ve seen physical disability disappear when forgiveness and mercy replace shame and guilt.”