It was 19-year-old Kori Peterson’s partner who first suspected she was pregnant, and it would be he who pressured her to have an abortion. Peterson didn’t want to believe she was expecting a baby with her boyfriend, especially since the relationship was rocky, but she also did not want to have an abortion.
Peterson told Live Action News, “I was adamant that I was not going to have an abortion. But my boyfriend had other ideas. He made an appointment at Planned Parenthood where I learned I was five weeks pregnant.”
Facing pressure to abort
While Peterson initially was reluctant to consider abortion, she became concerned about her reputation as a young Christian woman who had engaged in premarital sex. Additionally, her boyfriend began pressuring her to end the pregnancy.
“He made promises to me that if I acquiesced to his wishes, we would get married at a later date and have another baby,” Peterson said. “I was desperate to hold onto him, and I wanted to do whatever I could to save the relationship, even though I knew in my heart that it was wrong.”
Two weeks after her initial visit to Planned Parenthood, Peterson’s boyfriend drove her to the facility for an abortion.
“I felt like a zombie,” she said. “I let him take the lead that day. When I arrived, I was the first appointment of the day, but I was asked if someone could go ahead of me, for which I was relieved.”
Undergoing the abortion
She recalls a staff member telling her the surgery was “no big deal” and that many women came in during their lunch hour to have abortions.
“I think they were trying to normalize the procedure and diminish any fear I had or perception that what I was doing was wrong,” Peterson said. “I would soon learn that my decision would be devastating.”
In the procedure room, a nurse tried to distract Peterson from the ensuing pain by talking to her. Once it was over, the nurse plopped a maxi pad on the table, then walked out.
Peterson said, “As I came out of the room, I saw a recovery room of sorts filled with cots. Because I felt so lightheaded, I lay down on one of them.”
She was given a paper bag with birth control pills, which she later discarded.
Abortion trauma
“My boyfriend was in good spirits afterward, telling me I looked good,” Peterson said. “But I felt anything but. I spiraled out of control after the abortion and went into a deep depression.”
Eventually, her boyfriend noticed the change and told her she was no longer the same person.
Peterson said, “I was due to go back to Planned Parenthood for a follow-up and asked my boyfriend to go with me, but he wanted to go skiing instead. In the end, he did go, but broke up with me as soon as we returned. I begged him to stay, but he ignored me.”
Heartbroken, Peterson went to bed that night, not caring whether she woke up the next morning.
READ: Therapist: Abortion trauma is real and women ‘deserve better than to suffer’ silently for years
“I kept putting one foot in front of the other, just trying to survive,” Peterson said. “I was crying all the time.”
She eventually confessed to her mother about the abortion, and her mother revealed she had suspected what Peterson had done, but she didn’t take the conversation further.
Healing from the abortion
“I had a good friend who was a sounding board during this time,” said Peterson. “One night I called her, but she wasn’t home. Her mom answered and I blurted out my secret to her. She was a pastor’s wife, and she asked if she could pray for me.”
The woman told Peterson to read through Psalms, and she obediently read the whole book in three days. Next, she was told to study Proverbs. On a notepad, she copied down verses that spoke to her.
“I felt like everything was going to be okay,” Peterson said. “We eventually started a Bible study together.”
Still, Peterson had moments when she was inconsolable, struggling silently with guilt and grief. One night, she showed up unexpectedly at her friend’s house, hoping to speak to her mother, but she was entertaining guests at the time. She told Peterson she should consider post-abortive counseling.
“The local pregnancy support center was hosting a post-abortive workshop, ‘Silent Voices,’ and I signed up for it,” said Peterson. “It turned out to be a huge leap in my healing process. I left behind the guilt and grief and even learned to forgive my boyfriend.”
Around that time, another man, Jamie, came back into her life, and the two became friends. She was working at a Bible camp that summer, and it was common to share testimonies around the fire at night.
“For the first time, I shared my testimony,” Peterson said. “A woman there who had multiple miscarriages came alongside to offer comfort.”
Later, while at a church retreat, Peterson felt the Holy Spirit urging her to again share her abortion experience. She did so while clutching Jamie’s hand for strength.
“My abortion became part of my story, and I spoke out more often,” she said. “I’ve partnered with Concerned Women for America to share my testimony with their donors and began referring women to the post-abortive workshop I attended. It was truly life-changing. I want to help other women and to save babies.”
She and Jamie, who had offered her unwavering support throughout her healing process, eventually married and had two sons.
“I started a blog and shared it to Facebook, wondering what kind of blowback I might get,” Peterson said. “But, as it turns out, people were interested in hearing my story. It was the incredible, miraculous hand of Jesus that pulled me out of the pit of despair.”
