Before a confirmed spina bifida diagnosis, a nurse and doctor pressured her to abort

(Unplanned Stories) At 29 years old, Margie was a nurse and mother of two when a routine prenatal test at 20 weeks suggested her third child might have spina bifida, a condition in which the spine and spinal cord fail to develop fully.

After completing her blood work, Margie clearly remembers the nurse asking if she wanted an abortion. She was taken aback and quickly said no. The nurse pressed, asking if she understood the impact this pregnancy could have on her life – the challenges of raising a child with a disability.

Margie responded firmly, “If that’s what God gave me, that’s my choice.”

An abortion offered too soon

After the nurse suggested abortion, the doctor, also a woman, walked in and immediately advised Margie to get an abortion.

Margie made it clear that they did not yet know if the baby had spina bifida. The doctor paused and left the room for a moment, clearly frustrated that the nurse had suggested abortion before the test results. 

When the doctor returned, she apologized and said they would proceed with the amniocentesis, a test that examines the baby’s amniotic fluid for genetic conditions, to get a definitive answer.

Sitting with her two small children at home, just 2 and 4 years old, Margie prayed to God to help her through her pregnancy. Her third pregnancy had not been planned, and her mind raced with worries about what the future might hold.

Her obstetrician warned her that if the baby did have spina bifida, her child likely would not live past six months. If her baby did live past that, they might never walk and would probably spend their life in a wheelchair. 

During the six-week wait for results, Margie’s biggest concern was how her baby’s disability would impact her two children. Margie says she wanted her children to be prepared for the possibility that their sister might look different from other babies. She also started preparing mentally — imagining ramps in her home and counseling for her children to help them adjust.

When the amniocentesis results came in, they showed no signs of spina bifida. Her ultrasound results also came back normal, showing no signs of breaks in the baby’s spine or lumps along the back.

“That is where I chose life,” she says, “because I was offered to abort this baby before the results.”

A smooth delivery and a heart for helping others

Margie’s labor with her daughter went smoothly. Having already raised two children, she felt grounded and prepared. But the journey leading up to that day left a lasting impact on her, shaping how she viewed the power of community and the importance of support for women facing unplanned pregnancies.

Having leaned on community resources in her own early years as a mother, she now believes every woman should have access to that kind of help — through churches, local outreach programs, or simply caring people willing to step in.

After her second child was born, Margie and her husband became actively involved in a local organization that provided maternity clothes, formula, bassinets and other essentials for mothers choosing life. 

“There’s groups out here to help young women,” she says. “We have to encourage them because they did make that huge step to keep that baby.”

Margie also wishes more women were given the chance to truly understand their options before choosing abortion. She believes that requiring a sonogram before an abortion could change many minds.

According to the Guttmacher Institute, only 13 states currently require an ultrasound to be performed before an abortion. Data from the National Institute of Family and Life Advocates reports that more than 80 percent of women considering abortion chose life after seeing their baby on an ultrasound.

“They should be [able to look] at what they’re aborting before they do it,” Margie says. “[They] would probably keep the child no matter what their situation is.”

Life today

Margie is now “semi-retired” and living in California with her husband of 40 years. Though she stepped back from full-time nursing after a long career, she remains deeply involved in family life, helping raise the “second generation.”

She and her husband have been raising one of their two grandsons since he was 14 months old. They have helped with his homework, guided him through school and supported him as he navigates childhood. Margie views this chapter of her life as a chance to be fully present for her family, offering the care and stability they need to thrive.

Margie’s words of encouragement to those facing an unplanned pregnancy:

“If you have family help, go to your family. Ask for help. If [you’re considering] adoption, then I would encourage adoption. I would never encourage abortion at all. Think of your means of how you can keep the baby – that’s exactly what I did with my daughter.”