Family shares the impact of their miscarried son's life

A miscarriage taught Caitlin Keller and her husband that no matter what happens, God is in control — and that He loves their children even more than they do.

Keller and her husband already had one son, Jonah, when they experienced the miscarriage of their second child — a baby boy they named Leo. They were heartbroken, but marveled at how beautifully developed he was at just 12 weeks — his fingers, his ears, his face. They moved forward with sadness for his death, but also with gratitude for his life. They went on to have a daughter, Genevieve.

Then, some years later, they received terrifying news: Jonah had been diagnosed with aplastic anemia, a rare and serious condition in which the bone marrow fails to produce enough new blood cells, causing fatigue, increased risk of infection, and bleeding. Treatment requires a stem cell transplant, and without treatment, the mortality rate can exceed 70%.

Through the storm of Jonah's diagnosis and treatments, Keller realized she still had peace — and she believes it was because of the lessons God taught her when she miscarried Leo years earlier.

"People often ask: 'How did you make it through Jonah's year with Aplastic Anemia?'" Keller explained on Instagram. "The truth is... our son Leo is a vital piece of that story."

Weaving the story

Though Leo was miscarried at 12 weeks, in that short time with his family he made a lasting and important mark on their lives. "He was tiny, but incredibly perfect," said Keller. "All his fingers and toes, the beginning of his ears, his little eyes. His gender was clear. We named him Leo Christopher."

She continued, "I held him. I couldn't stop looking at him through that night that I birthed him, even in death. We buried him in a cemetery with other babies, and his name is on a small plate. We grieved deeply. I wrestled with 'what ifs,' repeated questioning, and heartbreak. It was one of the hardest seasons of my life. But God was already weaving Leo into Jonah's story — and into ours — in a way I couldn't yet see."

Preparing for what was ahead

Keller explained that things were "unbearably heavy" after she miscarried Leo.

She had continued with her day-to-day routines but mourned the baby she had lost. She questioned whether she had done something wrong and wondered why an otherwise healthy baby would die.

"But slowly," she said, "through devotionals, prayer, and surrender, God began to teach me: we are not in control of our children's timelines. God loves them more than we ever could."

It was during the time of Jonah's diagnosis that Keller became pregnant again. A friend asked her, "Do you think there will be a point in this pregnancy where you won't feel anxious about losing the baby?"

Her response surprised her. She said:

God could decide tomorrow that Genevieve or Jonah would die, because that is His plan. We would be sad, we would grieve, but we would also be at peace — because God is in control.

She later explained on Instagram that she "didn't know it at the time, but that truth — planted through Leo's life and death — was preparing us for what was coming."

Reality Check:

When Jonah was diagnosed, the family's "world was flipped upside down," Keller said. "We went from excitement about an unexpected baby on the way, to months of an emotional and physical intensity I won't ever be able to describe."

She continued:

Watching your child scream through being sedated and brought back to an OR without you — it never gets easier. Chemotherapy. Transplant. A 10-20% chance of death. But here's the thing: Leo had already given us the gift we would need most.

Keller had peace. "So when Jonah's diagnosis came, it didn't crush us," she said. "It was devastating, yes. But we didn't live in anxiety. We lived in peace... God is in control of every detail of our lives."

The Big Picture:

After the birth of their son Gregory, Jonah has received the gift of peace as well. "Gregory was born and gave Jonah a light and a joy to focus on," Keller explained.

Life presents challenges. It brings grief. It brings joy and it offers hope. Leo never lived physically outside of his mother's womb, but he had a profound impact on his family's lives. And Gregory is an unexpected gift that helps bring more peace and joy to their lives. Both unplanned babies, both a gift, and both deeply loved.

The Bottom Line:

For Keller and her family, the loss of Leo was devastating, but the gift his brief life gave them will remain with them here on Earth as they look forward to seeing him in Heaven.

"Jonah is a warrior. Leo is a vital piece of his journey," said Keller. "And God's mercy lives forever."