Coerced into abortion by her mother at 13, the trauma nearly destroyed her

At age 13, Brittany had just moved to another state and was living with her aunt when she learned she was pregnant. Very quickly, she was pressured to have an abortion she didn't want, and it caused her lasting trauma. Brittany spoke with Live Action News to tell her story.

Key Takeaways:

• Brittany became pregnant at age 13 and was forced into an abortion she didn't want.

• The lasting trauma resulting from that abortion later led her to drop out of college, and she became suicidal.

• Brittany eventually had another son, but lost custody of him and became homeless.

• Today, she wants girls and women to know that it is illegal to force someone into an abortion and that here are resources available to help them.

The Details:

Brittany spoke with Live Action News, explaining that she began having morning sickness shortly after moving in with her aunt, but didn't realize what was happening. When she told her older sister about feeling sick, her sister asked about her period and deduced that Brittany was pregnant.

"I think I didn't really know what to think or how to process it," Brittany told Live Action News. "I sat on it for a few days to a week and then told my aunt."

Coercion and manipulation

Brittany's aunt quickly informed Brittany's mother about the pregnancy. Her mother flew there and insisted that Brittany have an abortion. Her mother listed all of the reasons that she believed it was the right decision: 'It wasn’t a baby, it was just a clump of cells and would never know anything, Brittany wasn’t prepared to care for a baby, she was too young, her body wouldn’t be able to handle pregnancy and delivery, and she would die.'

Brittany's mother even told her that scraping her baby out of her uterus was of no more consequence than scraping skin cells off of her arm. Brittany knew her mother was wrong, but at the age of 13, she struggled to win the argument.

“I said, ‘It’s a human being.’ I didn’t have the words at the time, but I knew it was human, was its own entity," Brittany explained. "It might be attached to me, but it was still separate from me.”

Brittany’s mother was not a Christian, and she and Brittany’s stepfather did not attend church. But when Brittany was living with her father, she attended his church, and she had even begun going to a local church on her own. She knew that she shouldn’t have had sex and shouldn’t be pregnant. But she also knew that the baby was a human being.

Her mother’s false justifications for abortion didn't change Brittany's mind about having her baby.

But Brittany’s mother soon moved to a new tactic: threats.

She sat Brittany down at the dining room table and told her that if she had the baby, she would not have the support of her parents and would have to leave school and work — and so would her boyfriend.

Brittany said her mother claimed there would be no health insurance for Brittany, that she would be ineligible for Medicaid, and that the government would not offer her any assistance. She also told Brittany that, despite all of that, it would be illegal for her not to get prenatal care. 

Her mother even threatened to give up her parental rights and hand Brittany over to the state, where she claimed Brittany would be sent to live in foster care, and her baby would be taken from her.

“I thought she was serious and that I was going to be an orphan. I thought I was never going to see any of my family again and was going to lose my baby because she told me they would take the baby from me at birth. Now I realize it was just a manipulation,” said Brittany. “Now that I’m older, I know my biological father wouldn’t have allowed it. My grandmother would have said I could live with her. I didn’t get to call my father or my grandmother at all.”

As the conversation progressed and the pressure to abort grew, Brittany began to panic, and everything in the room seemed to blur. She experienced tunnel vision, a known reaction to a high-stress situation. Terrified, Brittany relented. 

That night, they were in a hotel room preparing for an abortion the following day. Brittany said it felt like she was on death row, just waiting for the time to be up, waiting for her baby to be taken and killed. During that night, her mother continued to pressure her.

Brittany told Live Action News that the doctor at the abortion facility was “rude and demeaning." Brittany went under anesthesia and woke up with the abortion completed.

Depression and dropping out

“My emotions were numb,” she explained. “I think… I kind of blurred everything for a few years and tried not to think about it. I felt ashamed. I tried to carry on like it never happened and [tried] to do better and not bring shame to my mom and focus on school and earn her trust back. I ended up having emotional problems throughout high school, but I hid them pretty well from everybody.”

Brittany continued to date her boyfriend but began having emotional outbursts and acting aggressively with him at times, losing her temper. They eventually broke up.

She attended college on a scholarship for pre-med, but developed severe depression and anxiety soon after. Her embryology course was difficult to sit through as her knowledge of her baby as a human being and not a clump of cells was confirmed by the information she was learning.

When her professor began talking about abortion and stated that there was “criminal abortion and legal abortion,” Brittany’s emotional health declined. She believed her professor was describing her as having had a criminal abortion, and Brittany withdrew from the class. She was diagnosed with clinical depression, and with just eight classes left until graduation, she dropped out.

“It kept getting worse. Mild anxiety to severe anxiety. I eventually dropped out of school after going from getting As and Bs to feeling like I couldn’t carry on," she said. "I didn’t care about school anymore. I was getting Fs and withdrawing. I stopped going to class. At some point, I tried to tell my mom that I wanted to switch out of pre-med. Emotionally, I was a wreck, but she didn’t understand that.”

Brokenness and breaking down

A couple of years later, Brittany was married and found out she was pregnant again, and this time, she had the freedom to give birth to her baby, but she struggled with severe postpartum depression. 

She suffered a breakdown and became suicidal. “I adored my son, but there was this dark side that had this grip on me. I felt worthless. I had a gun to my head, finger on the trigger, and I was trying to will myself to pull the trigger,” she said.

Just then, a text from her mother came through, telling her to seek help — and Brittany put down the gun. 

“I was so angry because I was so tired of feeling this way, but I couldn’t figure it out. I was tired, confused. I knew I had to change something," she said.

Meanwhile, her sister had a baby at age 19, and though their mother had initially attempted to coerce her to abort too, Brittany's sister refused, and ultimately, her mother loved and doted on Brittany's sister's baby.

Brittany was left feeling she had not been brave enough at 13 to save her own baby.

When she approached her mother about her feelings, she hoped her mother would grieve the loss of that baby and the coerced abortion with her, to agree that it wasn’t the best choice. Instead, her mother said she didn’t regret it and wouldn’t change it. 

A few years later, Brittany learned that coerced abortion is illegal and tried to talk to her mother again. This time, her mother allegedly denied pressuring her into an abortion.

“She changed the story and said that I wanted the abortion. She said she was trying to convince me to keep the baby. She majorly gaslighted me, tried to twist the truth," she said.

A year later, Brittany tried one more time to talk to her mother about the abortion, but again, it didn’t go well. The two no longer speak. 

Brittany’s marriage became unstable, and she and her husband eventually divorced. Brittany ended up homeless, and although they shared custody of their son, her son stayed with her ex-husband, and Brittany was left without a home.

Because she was living out of her car, her husband fought for full custody, won, and took their son to live in another state. Brittany’s heart was broken.

What's Happening Now:

Today, Brittany is able to trace her struggles and emotional health problems back to the coerced abortion. 

Brittany is remarried and working again, and she has plans to relocate to be closer to her son. Her story speaks volumes about how abortion can derail a woman’s plans and dreams and cause mental health concerns that last.

She wants girls and women to know that it’s a crime for someone to pressure them into having an abortion and that there are resources to help them. She encourages girls to keep their babies. 

“I don’t think anyone should be forced or intimidated into having an abortion… We don’t have a right to make death happen,” she said. “We should be making life happen.”

The Bottom Line:

Forcing women to have an abortion is illegal in every state, and in December, Rep. Mark Messmer (R-Ind.) introduced the Forced Abortion Prevention and Accountability Act.

The bill seeks to establish federal penalties for intentionally administering an abortion-inducing drug to a woman without her consent.