My twin girls would be 40 if they hadn’t been aborted. One day, I’ll meet them in heaven.

Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this guest post are solely those of the guest author. Live Action News has made minor edits for clarity.

My twin girls would be 40 today. But their life was snuffed out before they had a chance.

Forty years ago.

It was my right and choice. I knew in my heart that it was wrong, and I told their mom that. But when push came to shove, I was weak and selfish, and I supported her in her decision.

I went with her to the clinic, and I’ll never forget walking through the front door to the office. It felt as though I had entered a cloud of spiritual darkness.

Sitting in the waiting room, I looked around, wondering what I was part of… I looked at the people with lifeless faces as I entered my personal horror movie.

That day changed my life forever.

What no one tells you: If you choose to allow someone to take your child’s life, or in my case, my children’s lives, you’ll experience pain beyond comprehension. It’s a natural response to having someone take your child’s life.

Think about allowing someone to take your child’s life because you permitted them. The grief and emotional anguish that follow are natural. At that moment, you have a choice to suppress the pain and believe it was your “right” and “choice,” which will lead to internal turmoil and bitterness, or embrace the truth and healthily work through your grief.

I suppressed the pain for years. It consumed me, and I almost allowed it to take my life.

READ: The story of Clementine’s abortion went viral. Now her father’s fighting to give her a funeral

I can’t describe the turmoil I dealt with for years. I pretended it didn’t happen.

But one day, I was sitting with some Christian friends praying. I felt God’s hand on my shoulder and a quiet voice telling me to let go and trust Him with my sins. I began weeping uncontrollably, which caught everyone’s attention, and the praying stopped.

Through my tears, I confessed that I allowed someone to take my child’s life. I didn’t know I had twins until later.

As I continued weeping on my knees, I felt God reach down and remove the 500-lb. weight of shame and guilt that burdened me for years.

If you are reading this, chances are, you or someone you know has lost a child because of abortion.

I encourage you to stop suppressing the pain and give it to Jesus. He will forgive you and heal your heart. You no longer have to live in darkness but can experience hope, joy, and peace like never before.

One day, I will meet my twin girls in heaven for the first time.

Editor’s Note: If you are suffering from a past abortion, click here for resources on where to find help and healing.

Urge Walmart, Costco, Kroger, and other major chains to resist pressure to dispense the abortion pill