TikTok couple Matt and Abby Howard announce tragic miscarriage at 17 weeks

TikTok influencer couple Matt and Abby Howard shared heartbreaking news with their followers over the weekend, announcing they had lost their third baby at 17 weeks of pregnancy.

Key Takeaways:

• Matt and Abby Howard, a TikTok couple who run the Unplanned Podcast, shared on Saturday that they lost their preborn daughter at 17 weeks due to a genetic condition.

• The couple has two young sons, ages 3 and 2, and they were looking forward to welcoming their third child.

• They had previously shared that this pregnancy was planned, whereas their second pregnancy was not, but that "every baby is a blessing."

The Details:

In a joint statement on Instagram on Saturday, September 27, the couple said, "It is with very heavy hearts that we share about the loss of our baby girl born far too soon."

The couple explained:

"At a routine pregnancy appointment, our doctor could not find a heartbeat. Shortly after they sent us in for an ultrasound where the technician said words we will never forget, 'I am so sorry[;] I do not have good news.' That is when we got the gender reveal we never hoped for and also the news that our baby had a genetic condition that took her life around 17 weeks gestation."

They called the experience "unimaginable" and said, "The grief is absolutely devastating." However, they added that they have "so much gratitude for the time that we did get to have with her. And we still have hope. Hope has continued to show up for us in so many ways."

"For now," they wrote, "we will grieve and continue to think of ways to honor her life offline. Thoughts and prayers are more than welcome. Thank you everyone for celebrating this precious life with us for the past 17 weeks."

Matt and Abby, who were high school sweethearts, have two sons, Griffin, age 3, and August, age 2. They have over 5 million followers and host the Unplanned Podcast together. They announced the pregnancy with their baby girl on their podcast just one month ago.

"We were genuinely so stoked when we read the positive pregnancy test. It was just like pure joy," said Matt.

Abby noted that it was a very different experience from their second pregnancy, which was unexpected and came very soon after welcoming their first child.

"...I do know that a lot of you out there can relate," said Abby. "Like, having an unplanned pregnancy is — every baby is a blessing and we love him and we cannot imagine our lives without our second son — but it's a totally different experience in early pregnancy, like first finding out when you're like expecting it, planning for it, looking forward to it, and then just like, completely feeling like you got the rug swipped out from under you."

Matt said he wanted to have more children because he realized the value of family over the holiday season and got excited about having a "big, lively, fun, joyful family."

The Bottom Line:

When those in the public eye are willing to openly share their grief about the loss of a preborn baby, it sends the message to others that it is normal to grieve the loss of a child, even if that child was still in the womb. That shared grief can help bring healing to those who have experienced similar loss, who often feel they are expected to suffer in silence or simply "get over it."

While openly sharing about pregnancy loss makes us vulnerable, it also allows others to grieve the loss with us and gives them permission to grieve their own pregnancy losses — something that starkly contradicts a world that so often treats preborn children as less than they really are.