Guest Column

My greatest regret is that I aborted the only child I ever conceived

aborted, regret, euthanasia

I was married when I learned I was pregnant. I had become unhappy in my marriage after a short time, but to my own detriment, I was too independent and strong willed to try and work things out. I had closed my mind to the relationship and stubbornly held to that plan.

I didn’t want to confide in anyone, but there was one so-called friend who, seeing my unhappiness, told me about her two abortions and presented the option to me. I was so unhappy that I had become pregnant and thought that it would not fit in  with my plan to leave the marriage, so I decided on my own — with no open conversation with my husband — to have an abortion. I told him I did not want to have a baby and he  arranged for the procedure.

Neither of us probably realized the impact of what we had  planned: he to arrange it at a clinic and me to go through with it. I felt little emotion. Emotion had all been used up by my selfish unhappiness.

READ: ‘The biggest regret of my entire life’: Elderly woman still suffers pain of abortion regret three decades later

Afterward, there was a feeling of freedom until reality began to sink into my life. I wanted to be independent and not need anyone. In some ways, that is how I have led my life. Alone.

It would have been good perhaps to have a life partner and to share joy and happiness of a child with him, but I was never able to think that way. The urge to become a mother seemed foreign to me as I went through life. I happened to have few friends who had babies and rarely was around children though it seemed like something I wanted to do. I once held a baby at a wedding party and it was a beautiful and precious moment in time which I will never forget. Yes — at that moment, I wanted the feeling of cradling a little one of my own in my arms.

Now, at the end of my years, I want to tell all young women and young men contemplating using abortion as birth control (as it had been described) or acting upon it for some other reason: Don’t do it. You will be sorry forever.  

I don’t know how I could one day welcome a child I killed or how that sweet child could ever welcome me, its mother. I believe God’s love covers all but there is always a price to pay for wrongdoing. And I believe what I did was wrong.

God forgive me, please… Baby forgive me, please. I am sorry. I never had a second chance that I know of. If I had tried, perhaps I could have helped create one but I never did.

It’s a lonely life without children to love you when you get older. I hope my message will help someone avoid living their life with this huge regret.

Editor’s Note: If you are struggling with abortion regret, please visit or Rachel’s Vineyard.

“Like” Live Action News on Facebook for more pro-life news and commentary!

What is Live Action News?

Live Action News is pro-life news and commentary from a pro-life perspective. Learn More

Contact for questions, corrections, or if you are seeking permission to reprint any Live Action News content.

GUEST ARTICLES: To submit a guest article to Live Action News, email with an attached Word document of 800-1000 words. Please also attach any photos relevant to your submission if applicable. If your submission is accepted for publication, you will be notified within three weeks. Guest articles are not compensated. (See here for Open License Agreement.) Thank you for your interest in Live Action News!

To Top