GQ’s ode to Obama reveals all you need to know about the cult of ‘choice’

Former President Obama’s departure has inspired all sorts of glowing (and not-so-glowing) post-mortems on his eight years in office. This week, GQ’s Ashley Fetters penned one of the most preposterous, but also one of the most revealing windows into the mindset of many supporters of our 44th president: “Thanks, Obama, for 4 Years of Glorious, Worry-Free Sex.”

Yes, because how could anyone possibly have a fulfilling sex life without the state? And never mind the babies killed, conscience rights trampled, or Planned Parenthood felonies ignored under Obama’s watch; as long as Ashley Fetters personally benefitted, nobody else matters, right?

What’s the logic behind this narcissism? You see, Obamacare’s “elimination of out-of-pocket costs for contraceptives” (read: passed the costs onto employers and/or taxpayers—out of sight, out of mind) guaranteed “every insured woman at least one cost-free way to counteract an unwanted pregnancy,” thereby ushering in a “golden age of not getting anyone pregnant by accident.”

That’s funny; despite never having spent a dime on birth control or acquired any for free, somehow, every time I walk out my door I can predict with 100% accuracy whether I will “accidentally” get someone pregnant. How? Am I just really lucky? Or maybe, just maybe, babies are made by known, conscious, easily-avoidable actions and not random chance…

Alas, this golden age may come to a close under President Donald Trump, who has pledged to repeal Obamacare and defund Planned Parenthood. Fetters writes:

And if state-level measures like New York’s proposed mandate fail, some 55 million American women may have to start paying as much as $50 a month for birth control pills again (or upwards of $1,000 for an IUD). In other words, some 55 million American women may have to start choosing again between low-risk sex with men and all the other myriad out-of-pocket expenses of adult life. Anxiety-free sex, or dinner on the table? Anxiety-free sex, or the rent? For many women, these could soon become everyday tradeoffs. (And that’s not to even mention that legal abortions—long a trusted escape hatch for women and couples facing unwanted-pregnancy crises—could soon be harder to come by than they’ve been for most of our lifetimes.)

First, Fetters has inadvertently undermined her own fear-mongering with that first sentence: without the HHS mandate, states will still be free to decide whether to subsidize birth control themselves. If it really is the “need” she paints it as, then shouldn’t there be enough people willing to vote out any governors or state lawmakers who refuse to provide it? If not, then maybe that’s a sign that the majority has figured out a healthier balance between gratification, affordability, and responsibility.

Second, as I pointed out last month, recognizing the difference between wants and needs, and making responsible decisions about what you can afford, are basic parts of adulthood. Sometimes that means prioritizing and reevaluating what’s most important to you. Sometimes that means temporarily delaying wants (and sorry, but casual sex is most definitely a want, not a need). Sometimes that means making tradeoffs and trimming the fat elsewhere in your budget. (Oh, and if you still can’t wean yourself off regular consequence-free sex you can’t afford, at least consider shopping around for cheaper birth control options. They’re out there!)

Third, killing innocent children is a “trusted escape hatch” from pregnancy? Man, I wish pro-aborts would make up their minds whether casualizing abortion as birth control is offensive (because no pro-abortion woman would ever, ever do such a thing), or unquestionably legitimate as an exercise of “reproductive rights.”

The piece isn’t a total loss, though—it also contains what may be the most honest expression of values an abortion supporter has ever typed:

Obama spent his presidency fighting for every American woman to be entitled to a worry-free sex life—the undersung bonus side effect of which is plenty more worry-free sex for men, too. He and his administration made a firm commitment to putting women’s minds at ease, reassuring them that kids were only in their futures when and if they wanted them. And in doing so, Team Obama also gifted you a golden era of fun, low-risk banging with your wife, your girlfriend, or the friendly gal who was nice enough to accompany you home from the bar. Because, surprise! Turns out we’re all more fun to have sex with when we’re not preoccupied with the worry of not accidentally creating babies.

Fun without worry. That’s why babies have to die, why private citizens have to cough up money to subsidize other people’s lifestyles, and why the First Amendment rights of religious people have to be trampled: so nobody has to let the thought of consequences get in the way of having a good time. Sure, the abortion lobby will dress it up with talk of economic hardship or exceptional medical circumstances, but selfishness is the real heart of their agenda.

I cannot thank Barack Obama for anything, but I can thank Ashley Fetters for showing America what the Cult of Choice is really all about.

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